□ 黄珊珊（外国语学院16级英语2班）
Recently China witnesses an extraordinaryRecently China witnesses an extraordinaryvehement debate on the availability of enactvehement debate on the availability of enacting a supportive policy to encourage collegeing a supportive policy to encourage collegestudents to establish their own businesses instudents to establish their own businesses inthe course of their campus life. A number ofthe course of their campus life. A number ofoptimistic individuals harbor the view thatoptimistic individuals harbor the view thatonly if we hold the encouragement on stuonly if we hold the encouragement on students’businesses can we firmly maintain thebusinesses can we firmly maintain thenormal economical activities that are wicknormal economical activities that are wickedly influenced by current economic crisisedly influenced by current economic crisis.Others, nevertheless, have a tendency to beOthers, nevertheless, have a tendency to beconservative and assert that university stuconservative and assert that university students are dispose to fail in the pursuit of vicdents are dispose to fail in the pursuit of victory as an entrepreneur because of the toughtory as an entrepreneur because of the toughcompetition among companies in presentcompetition among companies in presentand serious scarcity in experience and capaciand serious scarcity in experience and capacity of business. From my perspective of view,ty of business. From my perspective of view,however, it is essential, and necessary at thehowever, it is essential, and necessary at thesame time, that the government release thesame time, that the government release thepolicy to pose stimulation on the involvepolicy to pose stimulation on the involvement rate of establishing businesses amongment rate of establishing businesses amongcollege students. college students.In the first place, establishing business trigIn the first place, establishing business triggers reduction in the dramatically increasinggers reduction in the dramatically increasingunemployment rate. As far as I am conunemployment rate. As far as I am concerned, it is widely acknowledged that thecerned, it is widely acknowledged that theemployment rate is relatively low when inemployment rate is relatively low when incomparison with past several years. As thecomparison with past several years. As thesaying goes, saying goes,””Graduation equals unemploy Graduation equals unemployment.”, a majority of students, graduated or, a majority of students, graduated orundergraduated, are not in a position to seekundergraduated, are not in a position to seekfor proper jobs which they discover that it isfor proper jobs which they discover that it isa painful and dejecting process as a result ofa painful and dejecting process as a result ofthe intensive competition and a largethe intensive competition and a largeamount of population desiring for sufficientamount of population desiring for sufficientjobs to sustain their livelihood. Nonetheless,jobs to sustain their livelihood. Nonetheless,the embarrassing phenomenon now seemsthe embarrassing phenomenon now seemsto be close to a splendid solution. That is, into be close to a splendid solution. That is, indeed, to appeal for business establishment indeed, to appeal for business establishment incolleges, where there is ubiquity of studentscolleges, where there is ubiquity of studentswho have keen hearts for establishing theirwho have keen hearts for establishing theirbusinesses. In this case, of course, the beautybusinesses. In this case, of course, the beautyof more businesses will produce enormousof more businesses will produce enormousjobs available to be applied by those whojobs available to be applied by those whosuffer from unemployment and jostle forsuffer from unemployment and jostle forjobs. jobs.
In addition, establishing business provides reIn addition, establishing business provides reveal on prosperity of China veal on prosperity of China’ s business fu s business future. Nowadays, companies are sparing noture. Nowadays, companies are sparing noefforts to struggle to survive in the businessefforts to struggle to survive in the businesscircle with the tectonic shift of scientificcircle with the tectonic shift of scientifictechnology and the harsh modern society.technology and the harsh modern society.In order for realization of a greater andIn order for realization of a greater andstronger nation to appear in the universalstronger nation to appear in the universalstage, there is a keen demand for China tostage, there is a keen demand for China togive birth to a host of daisy companies togive birth to a host of daisy companies tocompete in the global economy with a viewcompete in the global economy with a viewto upgrade the global position of China andto upgrade the global position of China andmake China a great nation with fabulousmake China a great nation with fabulousbusiness. In this sense, students must feelbusiness. In this sense, students must feelobliged to have a wealth of knowledge onobliged to have a wealth of knowledge onbusiness and become excellent entrepreneursbusiness and become excellent entrepreneursin order to make contributions to theirin order to make contributions to theirmotherland. A nation cannot be strong unmotherland. A nation cannot be strong un less it has frequent and permanent communiless it has frequent and permanent communication and international trade with foreigncation and international trade with foreigncountries. Having mushroomed in the numcountries. Having mushroomed in the number of companies, I credit and have faith inber of companies, I credit and have faith inthe fact that our nation will become muchthe fact that our nation will become muchstronger. After all, there is no denying thatstronger. After all, there is no denying thatwe have a great number of first- rate stuwe have a great number of first- rate students in our nation and they are in a posidents in our nation and they are in a position to create unique and terrific companiestion to create unique and terrific companiesthat have the capacity to compete in thethat have the capacity to compete in theworld business. On the contrary, college stuworld business. On the contrary, college students are not able to get at the knowledgedents are not able to get at the knowledgethey learned in classes provided that theythey learned in classes provided that theyhave the opportunity to put what they sinkhave the opportunity to put what they sinkin into practice. As is known to us that ,in into practice. As is known to us that ,from historic perspective, ancient Chinafrom historic perspective, ancient Chinahave underwent an undelightful period thathave underwent an undelightful period thatrefused international trade and business andrefused international trade and business andisolated from the whole world, which resultisolated from the whole world, which resulted in infringement from the open-mindeded in infringement from the open-mindednations that possess advanced technologynations that possess advanced technologythat we took decades to catch up with.that we took decades to catch up with.From all above mentioned, it is secure for usFrom all above mentioned, it is secure for usto come to the conclusion that it is signifito come to the conclusion that it is significantly crucial and necessary for the governcantly crucial and necessary for the government to publish the policy that supports stument to publish the policy that supports students financially and scholarly with preferendents financially and scholarly with preferential choice to create their own businesses.tial choice to create their own businesses.Not only does it gives rise to soaring in emNot only does it gives rise to soaring in employment rate and retrieves the tense of job-ployment rate and retrieves the tense of job-seeking substantially, but also leads our naseeking substantially, but also leads our nation into a condition of brilliance and prostion into a condition of brilliance and prosperity.
注：此文荣获我校与台湾铭传大学“2018外语文化节英语写作决赛”二等奖
【教师点评】本次写作大赛要求参赛选手就两段素材撰写一篇600-700字的议论文。素材中提及考虑到经济危机及工作岗位的供给等因素，政府出台了优惠政策鼓励大学生自主创业，以缓解就业压力，塑造学生的自主和创新能力。然而由于大学生缺乏经验，
以及种种内部和外部原因，他们创业成功的几率十分渺茫。
事实上，“大学生创业”这个选题是近几年英语考试的热门话题。由于选材与大学生的学习生活息息相关，要想找到合适的论点和理由并非难事，这反而使得参赛选手想要脱颖而出更为不易。
然而，黄珊珊同学扎实的语言词汇功底使得全文读起来一气呵成。文章的开头段在简单介绍背景后直接提出了自己的观点：政府出台政策鼓励大学生自主创业是极为必要的。中间的两个正文段从降低失业率和增强民族实力两方面进行论述：第一个理由段的“毕业即失业”的大环境及第二个理由段新颖独特的立意均成为本文的加分点。最后一段重申作者观点，用一句话全新总结了以上两个理由。整篇文章结构合理、布局清晰、理由充分，富有感染力。
从句式上看，虽然该参赛者运用了小部分的写作模板句型，然而大量较为成熟的非模板句及较丰富的逻辑和关联词都给文章增色不少，诸如 China witnesses...;anumber of optimistic individuals harbor theview that ...; trigger; it is widely acknowl?edged that ...; in comparison with ... 等句型和表达都很值得广大在校生在作文中学习使用。此外，作者对于从句、分词做状语、插入语、倒装等写作的“花边点缀”都运用得相当熟练，语言功底很深厚。
值得一提的是，本文的亮点还在于黄珊珊同学扎实的词汇功底。她的文章中出现了很多专八词汇，如 edict, vehement,wicked, ubiquity, jostle, infringement 等，这正是很多参赛选手的作品所缺乏的。
可以说，这篇作文尽管存在少量的语言错误及用词不当，但在短时间内展示出来的思想深度、思辨能力及扎实的语言词汇功底都使它在众多作品中显得尤为突出，不愧为一篇佳作。
【外国语学院教师/刘芬 点评】
